Is it me, or are the months flying by before our eyes? May has been such a busy month. Most of it was spent in the USA with family, so this post is coming in just in the nick of time! The topic of conversation is something that I have been wanting to talk about on this blog ever since I heard the news of a beauty influencer, by the name of Jessica Pettway who passed away in March due to a misdiagnosis of fibroids. She was someone I had watched and followed over the years, but ever since I went on a somewhat permanent social media hiatus, I had been out of the loop and missed that she was even sick. So when I saw the news that this 36 year old had passed away leaving behind her husband and two young children, my spirit was disturbed, and I couldn’t shake this sadness. I learned that she was a Christian, and during her cervical cancer diagnosis, she had made public videos declaring that she believed that God would heal her and this would be part of her testimony. Sadly to say that wasn’t the case. The more I thought about it, the more disturbed I became. I thought to myself, what does something like this do to someone’s faith? I have no doubt she prayed with her family for healing, and others prayed for her. The bible says that the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. Jesus even said that if we pray for anything and believe we’ve received it, it will be ours!(Mark 11:24)
So if we pray for healing and don’t receive it, what does that mean? I thought about non-believers who would have followed her and seen her faith despite her diagnosis. I am sure they would have been inspired by her courage, maybe even pursuaded to believe in her God. What would they think about God now that she was gone? I struggled to make it make sense as a believer! But even in my disappointment and sadness for her and her family, I was 100% certain that God was still good! I just didn’t know how to explain it to someone, and that bothered me. Nobody even asked me or challenged me about it, but I knew that if I was ever in a situation where I still had to explain the goodness of God through tragedy, I would have found it hard to, and I am always reminded of the need to be able to explain the reason for the hope that I have.
I was then reminded of my mum, who has suffered from rheumatoid arthritis which is a long-term condition that causes pain, swelling, and stiffness in the joints. As she gets older, the pain seems to be more intense, leaving her at times unable to attend to herself without assistance. I remember when she first became a Christian. I think she thought that she would not suffer and God would heal her. But as time went on and her pain intensified, she began to question God’s goodness. She didn’t even have to say it, I knew she felt it. It was almost as if she believed that God was punishing her, or worse, that God didn’t care for her like He did for others. I didn’t blame her for thinking that. If you don’t understand who God is, you won’t see Him as a good God when you go through your trials. The bible doesn’t say that life will be perfect when you accept Jesus into your heart. We live in a fallen world under the influence of the evil one. All you have to do is turn on the news or scroll social media to see the injustice in this world. But what the bible does promise is eternal life and peace. A peace unlike the peace given from the world. This peace that comes from Jesus is the peace that keeps us afloat in a turbulent sea. JOHN 14:27 “PEACE I LEAVE WITH YOU; MY PEACE I GIVE TO YOU. NOT AS THE WORLD GIVES DO I GIVE TO YOU. LET NOT YOUR HEARTS BE TROUBLED, NEITHER LET THEM BE AFRAID.”
I asked my pastor what he thought about it, and he directed me to Job from the bible. Job was a man said to be blameless in the eyes of God, a man of complete integrity. He feared God and stayed away from evil. God had blessed him with a large family. He was the richest man in his entire area, yet he still gave offerings to God. He never let money corrupt his heart. Then, one day, Satan came before God and challenged Jobs character, claiming the only reason why he feared God was because of all that he had. If God took it away, then Job would curse God. So God allowed Satan to test him, with only one condition, that Satan was not allowed to harm him physically, but he had free reign to do whatever he wanted with whatever he possessed. Of course, Satan did his worst to Job, killing all his children and taking away his riches by killing his livestock, farmhands, and servants. In all of this, Job did not sin by blaming God, instead he fell to the ground in worship and said JOB 1:21 HE SAID, “I CAME NAKED FROM MY MOTHER’S WOMB, AND I WILL BE NAKED WHEN I LEAVE. THE LORD GAVE ME WHAT I HAD, AND THE LORD HAS TAKEN IT AWAY. PRAISE THE NAME OF THE LORD!” It was clear that Job understood who God was. Then I started to think about if I understood who God was, could I have that same conviction as Job?
I’ve always heard that it’s never good to plan too far ahead because God might suprise you. God’s plan for your life might not always be in line with what you plan for your life. We can pray for a long, fruitful life here on earth, but that is not guaranteed. Sometimes we forget that we are here for a short time, this world is not our home. Our assurance comes from knowing Jesus and the promise of eternal life for all who believe. If God takes us back to Him early, could that mean that our work here on earth is finished, or are we to take it as punishment? Job remembered that everything he had, God had given him. Even in his grief, he still knew the goodness of God. Ultimately, as a believer, we want to submit to our Fathers will. His way is always better, even if we can not see it at the time.
I started to think about what life actually meant to me. How attached I was to the things I knew and the routine of my life. If I got sick and God didn’t heal me, would I curse God or praise Him anyway? Then I started to think about my life before I knew Jesus. How everything was dark and meaningless. If I had been sick then. Never knowing Jesus. Dying in my sin. Forever separated from the Father! I felt a wave of fear and dread come over me. I realised that God will always be good because He called me to Him, and He chose me. He saved me from death. Jesus paid the price I couldn’t by shedding His blood for me. He has given me more than I could have ever dreamed of by that one act alone! For that reason, God will always be good! If I get sick tomorrow, God is good. If I lose a loved one, God is good. If I lose my job, God is good. If I lose my home, God is good. GOD. IS. GOOD. PSALMS 34:8″OH, TASTE AND SEE THAT THE LORD IS GOOD; BLESSED IS THE MAN WHO TRUSTS IN HIM!”
If you are a believer, death is not bad. It’s the people that you leave behind that suffer the most. But the comfort we have is knowing that we will not be separated from them forever. It is just a short time. If we are still here on this earth, that means that we have an assignment to complete, and we have a purpose. Going home to be with the Lord is exactly that; going home to a place that Jesus prepared for you. How beautiful to know that is what awaits you. How comforting for a family like The Pettways who are left behind. Maybe they might not see it now because the grief is still raw, and we that are left behind have to sort through life and find a new normal without the ones we’ve lost. But I pray that they find the peace that surpasses all understanding. I pray that they draw closer to God PSALMS 34:18 “THE LORD IS CLOSE TO THE BROKENHEARTED AND HE SAVES THOSE CRUSHED IN SPIRIT.”
Through the good times and the bad times, God will forever remain good. Whatever you suffer through now, whether it’s sickness or struggling financially, whatever your trial is, just know that it will not be forever. When we enter into heaven, there will be no sickness, no tears, no pain, just joy! Our riches await us in heaven, so keep your eyes focused on things from above! My wish is to be like Job. Someone who, when grief, knocks at my door, I will fall to my face and declare through tears, “I came naked from my mother’s womb, and I will be naked when I leave. The Lord gave me what I had, and the Lord has taken it away. PRAISE THE NAME OF THE LORD!”
MY CONVICTIONS 